In a previous blog post How to Tell Your Children About Your Divorce, I discussed how best to inform your children about your divorce as well as methods to minimize trauma for them. In this post, I’ll go into more detail as well as discuss what the research shows about how children respond to divorce based on your child’s age. I will also provide some co-parenting tips. Please keep [...]
When someone finds out they are about to get a divorce, or the topic is on the table for discussion, oftentimes the first thing they do is have a consultation with an attorney. While consulting with an attorney makes sense, it isn’t always the best first step. Divorce is one of life’s most difficult transitions. It’s ranked second in difficulty only to the experience of the death of a [...]
I have noticed a disturbing trend in relationship dynamics.... “ghosting” to end a relationship. While ending a relationship in this way has been around for ages...the term is relatively new, and I feel, appropriate. Ending a relationship is never easy and rarely do both parties want the relationship to end at the same time. Though it can happen, it is the exception, not the rule. The “ghoster” in the [...]
In my first session with clients, I explore their position in the relationship. As William (Bill) Doherty, PhD (the mastermind behind Discernment Counseling) points out, when a couple is considering divorce, there is typically a "leaning in" partner and "leaning out" partner. The leaning in partner doesn't want the divorce and the leaning out partner does. My process is different for each party. If the client is leaning in, [...]
I typically start seeing divorcing women at the stage when they are considering divorce. They are early on in the process and trying to decide if their marriage can be salvaged. Some of the first questions I get if there are children involved go something like this: "How will the children be affected? If we decide to do it, how do we tell them?" Generally speaking, how the children [...]
Imagine yourself as a little girl. You’re playing with your Barbies and setting up a wedding scene. As you set up the scene, you create your own ideal wedding scene in your mind. You imagine yourself in your gorgeous white flowing wedding dress, make-up perfectly applied and hair flawlessly swept up to set off the sparkly earrings adorning your ears. […]
